


upon the breathless starlit air

by Marcia Elena (marciaelena)



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Angst, Community: spnspringfling, Last people on Earth, M/M, Post-Apocalypse, Sibling Incest, Supernatural Spring Fling, Supernatural Spring Fling 2018
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-16
Updated: 2018-04-16
Packaged: 2019-04-23 16:55:02
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,018
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14336919
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/marciaelena/pseuds/Marcia%20Elena
Summary: A night like no other





	upon the breathless starlit air

**Author's Note:**

  * For [WetSammyWinchester](https://archiveofourown.org/users/WetSammyWinchester/gifts).



> My entry for the 2018 spnspringfling challenge. Written for wetsammy and her prompt: _It's a beautiful night, we're looking for something dumb to do_. 2nd person Dean POV.

It's a beautiful night. 

That's what you say to him when you come into the war room to find him. 

"It's a beautiful night, Sammy." You say the words and for his sake you want them to be true, you want to make them real. 

You could pretend. You could close your eyes and imagine that you're standing outside with him. You can see it in your mind, the sky hanging like black tarp high above you, stars like shards of glass piercing their way through to illuminate the dark.

But you're not up there. You're down here, hidden away underground with your brother. And you don't want to pretend.

There's a dimming flashlight on the table, and you set yours down next to it. They're the only lights left in the bunker. There's no power and the air's gone stale. The food ran out four days ago, and the water won't last another two. This is the war room, but there are no more wars to fight. The world out there is poisoned and desiccated, empty of everything once living.

"Dean," Sam says. Just your name and nothing more, but you can hear it all in that one syllable. 

And you sigh. You sigh because it's late, it's too late and you're so tired. You sigh because you know you can't protect him and the pain of it burns bright inside you, love and grief balled up into something akin to a star and it's like that whole imagined sky is inside you and it's trying to get out, a billion trillion sharp pieces pushing through your gut and your skin and your eyes and your throat and all the air in your lungs is escaping and you wish it could be enough to keep Sam alive but it isn't, you know it isn't, you know you've never been enough. 

"Dean," Sam says again. And here he is, standing right in front of you now. Here he is with his hands on your shoulders. 

He pulls you closer and you let him. He slants his mouth against yours and you sigh again, you sigh into him just before he kisses you and you know it's not enough, you know but you wish it could be, oh, you wish, you wish, you kiss him back with your whole self and the sky inside you doesn't feel brittle anymore, all your stars turned incandescent under the heat of your brother's kiss.

It feels like forever while it lasts. It's over in an instant. 

_It's over. It's over. It's all over._

You wrap your arms around him and you hold him so tight, so tight, and he tries to pull you even closer to him, he doesn't let you go. You stand in utter silence in each other's arms and you listen to every breath he takes, you listen and it aches, it hurts because it's the most beautiful sound you've ever heard and sorrow keeps trying to spill over but Sam keeps mouthing words against your neck like a salve, like a litany too private to be voiced.

It's over. You can't stay here. You can't _stay_. 

"Let's go out", you say to him. _Let's go out_. You don't want to die down here in the dark. You don't want Sam to die down here in the dark. 

"Anywhere." Sam's lips brush against your ear as he speaks and you shudder. "Anywhere if I'm with you."

You grab your flashlight and he grabs his. You cross the foyer and go up the stairs with him, twin beams of light showing the way, your synchronized footsteps counting down seconds until you reach the door. 

And then you're outside and it's your last night on Earth and you're standing under the open sky with Sam. 

"Look at that," he says. "It really is a beautiful night."

You look at him. You look at him and you watch him watch the stars. 

You don't need to look up because you're carrying the sky inside you. You don't need to see the stars one more time because Sam's the shiniest thing there's ever been, and every point of light in you has always borne his name.

He turns to look at you and you wonder if you've said it out loud or if it's the blood in him answering the call of the blood in you. You reach for his hand and he takes it, and together you walk to the middle of the road. 

So here you are. Here you are at the end of all your roads. Here you are at the dead center of America. It might as well be the center of everything.

The air tastes, of all things, sweet. It's an unexpected mercy. 

You and Sam move as if you've rehearsed this, flashlights cast aside and clothes laid out on the tarmac to make a bed. You lie down with him next to you and you kiss him, you kiss him, you pour yourself into him and you let him pour himself into you, and each breath you share might be your last but not yet, not yet, _please_ , not yet. 

And it does spill over this time. Not just sorrow but joy too, all the love in you, all the moments of your life with him that you can remember, the way he looks when he smiles, the way you feel when he laughs. The way he fit in your arms when he was still a baby. The way he fits in your arms right now.

"I'm here," Sam says as he fucks you. "I'm here, Dean, I'm here, you're here, we're both here, we, you and me, we're here, _here_ ," he vows, and you hear it, you hear it all and you say it to him too, you say it with your hands and your kisses, you say it with your body and your tears, you say it with his name whispered between you like your most secret, most sacred truth.

It's a beautiful night. It's a beautiful night.

It feels like forever while it lasts.

***


End file.
